Encouraged by a sermon from their pastor following 9-11, elderly spinsters Gladys and Myrtle Gooseberger decide to send cookies to the CIA in Washington, D.C. to show their appreciation. They inadvertently substitute their homemade linament instead of vanilla as one of the ingredients. When the cookies arrive at the CIA, one of the agents eats one and keels over in a coma. The spinsters are then suspected of terrorism, especially since actual terrorists Ramadan and Izzadine (Ram and Izzie) have been detected in the neighboring town of Fidelity. The CIA are short of female detectives, so they send two macho agents, Jack Phillips and Max Henderson disguised as women, to the Wilderwood Christian Church to scope out the situation. Meanwhile, the actual terrorists disguise themselves as nuns and head for Wilderwood also, where they think a fellow terrorist may be holed out. They are intercepted not by authorities, but by a ‘funny farm’ bus headed for nearby Redeye, when they try to hitch a ride. They have left their black bag at the Wilderwood gas station, however, and who should find it but Gladys and Myrtle when they stop for gas. When agents Jack and Henderson arrive at Wilderwood, they are sabotaged by the Gooseberger spin-sters who suspect them of being the terrorists who left the bag. Meanwhile Jack falls in love with the Church’s activities director, Emily Baxter. And a desperate mother tries to hitch her nerdy bachelor son with Grace, who is Henderson’s female persona. It all comes to a head when the church cook-off explodes and Jack and Henderson are exposed as CIA. And what about the real terrorists? The surprise twist has to do with Henderson and the Goosebergers, while the agent who ate the cookies recovers, and Jack and Miss Baxter drive happily off into the sunset.